Tonight is stay-at-home date night. Take two. Through miscommunication I overlapped what was supposed to be date night with a walk with the kids and making fig preserves. Oops. Tonight I hope to get the Honeyheads to bed by 7:30 and dinner on by 8:00. Just have to write that down so I will believe it. Feel like I should be laughing.
After speaking to my friend, Emily, who is in France for a while, I realized that she verbalized what I feel about having dinner alone with Brian: it makes me feel like an adult. She said while they are in France they are staying with a host family and many nights they will feed the kids early, put them to bed, then have Adult Dinner. Ah, yes, I had forgotten about Adult Dinner. So nice to have steak by candlelight with Brian. He even bought crab legs.
Sometimes the pressure of going out on a date gets to me, so staying at home seems to short-circuit that. And being more affordable. And it's hard to beat Dr. Jordon's steak-grilling moxie.
Should I elaborate about the pressure of date night? It is really about my expectations. I expect that Brian will be enthralled with my presence and ask me deep and meaningful questions and there will never be a time where we are not gazing into one another's eyes. Except maybe bathroom breaks. And many times I am disappointed. We are usually tired, then there is the complication of getting a baby sitter, then the expense, and I don't really know why I don't like it. I do like it. I want to go out tonight. I feel confused.
The point about date night, wither staying in or going out, is to spend time with each other as a couple. I especially like being able to talk or listen without being interrupted. Let's be honest. I enjoy talking without being interrupted.
I have been praying that the Lord will help me with my expectations. And I don't know what that means yet. It is a work in progress.
Thank you for your comments to my last post. It is nice to hear your voice.
4 comments:
You've inspired me Amy. I'm getting the "I NEED a DATE!" feeling as it's been a month or more since we've gotten to go out along. Maybe an Adult Dinner at home would be just right. And I have a new dress Matt helped me pick out and bought me so I know just what to wear to our night-in.
Sometimes after the kids have been swimming and come in to play or watch a movie he and I get in the pool (we try to sneak out so they won't see us but one usually spots us) and don't allow kids in with us. The other day he was hungry so he brought out left-over steak cut in cubes, fresh bread from the bakery and some cheese. It was so fun to have "special" foods while we floated around our little above-ground pool. Times like that are like dates too. The kids aren't too thrilled that we're in the pool and won't let them join us, but they're too loud and splashy for our taste. :) Years from now they'll appreciate that we invested in our marriage by excluding them for a while. :)
(My comment was nearly as long as your post!)
I love the idea of a pool stay-at-home date. Hope you get to wear your new dress soon! :)
Wow your friend in France sounds awesome ;) Perhaps with our concerted efforts we can start the "Adult Dinner Revolution." Although somehow that sounds shady....um, maybe Dinner without Kids Revolution or "Grown up Dinner?" hmmmmm. :) See you soon friend!!!!!
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