Another Adventure in Mommyland

Most of the time my guys are easy and get along together, as seen in the photo above. Don't they look sweet and happy and innocent?

However, some days, like today, I want to call in my surrogate and go shut down for awhile.

We went to my parents to visit for the weekend. My boys are the only grandchildren on my side so far so you can imagine the thrills they have. They have grandma, grandpa, and many aunts and uncle's attention and even arise early every day so they can get three hours of Disney channel before I become conscious to what is going on upstairs. I'm not sure they ate a single unprocessed veggie this weekend, but they filled up on love and kisses and kittens and hanging out with their Johnson side of the family.

Whenever we come back from a weekend of this kind of fun we go through detox. Today I forgot about detox.

After going by the bank we stopped at our local ATT store to pay our internet bill. The salesperson greeted me and asked if I needed any help. (Me? A very pregnant woman with two active children on her arms? Could you be more specific?) I told her what I needed and she directed me to a kiosk where I could pay for my bill. Or I could go to a cashier and pay $5 extra. Ok, we're on a budget, I'll pay at the kiosk, no big deal. After 2.5 minutes of saying, "Don't touch that. Stand right there. No. No! Yes, you can push that button. Wait. Wait!" I felt like the five dollars would have been a small price to pay to let someone else push the buttons. Then on the way out, after I made sure James got his piece of toy armour and dollar bill he had brought in (he threw them down when he saw the kiosk) I walked out of the store. Three steps out of the door I heard a very loud head-hitting-the-glass-door sound and I turned around and saw James rubbing his forehead and squinting his eyes. Guess he was distracted by all the technology in the store.

Now on to our weekly grocery shopping. Just picture more of the same but without the running into door part. When we get to the checkout line I am one whipped puppy. I let James get out of the cart so he and Andrew can play with the toys that line the aisle just before you get to the cashier. He starts doing the pee-pee dance. Can you please wait? Yes. So after helping me throw a few things on the conveyor belt, he and Andrew squat down and play with the toys on the bottom shelf.  After I get all the groceries ready for the cashier James comes over to me again doing the pee-pee dance. I decide to try something new. I send James and Andrew into the ladies room by themselves.

I'm not really sure what happened while they were in there, but when they came out Andrew yelled loudly enough for me to hear several rows away, "Mom, James didn't wash his hands! He has germs!"

I threw some hand sanitizer in the cart and tried to ignore my children as they ran over to me and then ran away with a devilish look in their eyes.

To the customers who bought a bottle of coke from the cooler and where annoyed when it wasn't as cold as it might have been if Andrew and James hadn't opened and closed and opened and closed and opened and closed the door of it while I was trying to pay for the groceries: my sincerest apologies.